Love: Part Four

This is the fourth installment in our series on love.

The Bible indicates that love is from God. In fact, the Bible says "God is love." Love is one of the primary characteristics of God. Likewise, God has endowed us with the capacity for love. This capacity for love is one of the ways in which we are "created in the image of God.”

There are three primary words in the Greek language that are interpreted as ‘love’ in Greek literature. These three words are the ends and the middle of the spectrum of love. They are:

· Eros

· Phileo

· Agape

There are two words which can be used to briefly describe each of these. Those two words are ‘give’ and ‘take’. While there are much more detailed definitions and explanations of these three words, these are my simplistic explanations.

· Eros – this is a take/take relationship. It is the most destructive of the love relationships. It gives nothing. It takes everything. It is the basis of the English word ‘erotic’. This is a self destroying love.

· Phileo – this is a give/take relationship. This is the type most of humanity is familiar with. It is the beginning love a child has. It is based on performance. If you love me, I will love you. How many of us as children didn’t write and pass that note in grade school that professed our feelings for another with the ‘do you love me, check yes or no’ scribbled on the page. It is also called ‘brotherly’ love. It is the foundation of the city of Philadelphia, the city of brotherly love.

· Agape – this is a give/give relationship. This is the love that God has for us. It is the love that continues to give even as we take and abuse that love. It is the love that does not consider a past offence. This is the unearned sacrificial love that held Christ to the cross.

This continues the series based on 1^st Corinthians 13. We most often hear these scriptures at weddings, however, when Paul wrote them in his letter, he was not addressing a couple about to be married, but he was addressing the body of Christ.

We talked about, and will likely refer back to the long suffering, kind, un-envying characteristics of love in this study, as we talk about the non-hasty aspect of God’s love.

Does not vaunt itself

Love is not rash.

Ecclesiastes 7:8-9 “Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof: and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit. Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools.”

Let us look at the puffer fish. The puffer fish is known scientifically as the Tetraodontidae. Interestingly enough, it is considered to be the second-most poisonous vertebrae in the world. Also, the puffer fish are covered with spines, which are only visible when the fish is puffed up. While the puffer fish is highly maneuverable, it is very slow. This makes it seeming easy prey. Their excellent eyesight and great maneuverability generally keep them safe. Their back up defense mechanism, used of they are successfully pursued, is to fill their extremely elastic stomachs with water (or air when outside the water) until they are much larger and almost spherical in shape. Even if they are not visible when the puffer is not inflated, all puffers have pointed spines, so a hungry predator may suddenly find itself facing an unpalatable pointy ball rather than a slow, tasty fish. Predators which don't heed this warning (or who are "lucky" enough to catch the puffer suddenly, before or during inflation) may die from choking, and predators that do manage to swallow the puffer may find their stomachs full of tetrodotoxin, making puffers an unpleasant, possibly lethal, choice of prey. This neurotoxin is found primarily in the ovaries and liver, although smaller amounts exist in the intestines and skin, as well as trace amounts in muscle.

Love keeps us from acting in a hasty rash manner. Love is an action. Anger is a reaction. Anger exposes our sharp pointy spines and lethal toxins. Love waits. There are several overlapping qualities and quantities of love. We are talking about love not behaving rashly or quickly, but we could also add this to the quality of not being puffed up, or the quality of bearing all things, or even the quality of not being easily provoked.

The puffer fish blows itself up as a reaction. Flesh seeks to react at times. Our human carnal nature seeks to assert itself in what it perceives as an act of defense. It reacts as a method of self preservation. However, we have a savior who acts in our defense, if we allow Him to do so.

Love gives the benefit of the doubt. Love does not jump to hasty conclusions. Love is patient with those in contact with it. If you have seen those that are hasty in judgment, it is a love problem. If a person is quick to blame, it is a love problem. If a friend or loved one is hasty or rash in reaction to the actions of others, it is a love problem.

This is not to say that love is slow to act. Love moves quickly in a need. Love moves hurriedly to heal a hurt or right a wrong. The Children of God move hastily in love to apply the balm and soothe the hurt. It is the negative connotation we speak of when we think of rash actions or decisions. We have to guard against making rash decisions. Rash decisions are not actions, they are reactions.

Wave your hand suddenly in the face of a newborn and they will not blink their eyes. They have no conditioned response to do so as they have never been hit in the eye. Once they have been hit in the eye, they will blink or close the eye to protect it. We think it is instinctual. It is not. It is a learned response.

That being said, most of our reactions are not instinctual. They are learned responses. They are actions based on previous similar situations that have occurred in our lives. We react according to our experiences. We respond to every day events based on past experiences.

There are numerous of the characteristics of love which complement each other. Part of the kindness of love is in the patience in judgment. You will also find the quality of thinking no evil here. Herein is also contained the hoping all things, the bearing all things, and the believing all things. We will cover these in greater detail later in this study, but they do bear mentioning here as well.

As much as we can say what love is through these scriptures, it is also as important to see what love isn’t. If we say that love is not hasty in judgment, we can see then that love is slow to anger and swift to forgive. We can see the lack of rash or racing judgment in God’s coming to man in the Garden of Eden following man’s fall. He did not rush to the spot of man’s sin. He did not hasten to throw man out of paradise. He came, in the cool of the day, in the calm, quiet and composed. He had judgment with Him, but His love did not allow Him to come in haste.

When we have the love of God leading us, we will not react in haste.

Love stands between the situation and the reaction. We talked about love being patient (long suffering.) The key to that phraseology is in two parts.

The first part is the suffering aspect. This plainly states that there is suffering involved. The incentive is not a desired stimulus. By the very word, we can understand that the condition is causing pain. Whether it is a long dull ache or a sudden sharp pain, it is still pain, nonetheless. Who among us, even for the sake of love, wants to endure continuous or even occasional pain? The natural human reaction is to move quickly away from the source of pain. This is a reaction. (Touch something hot and see how quickly your body reacts to the pain of the heat.) This is the nature of flesh when it comes in contact with a painful stimulus. We do not want to endure physical pain.

Now, we come to the heart. I am not talking about the physical beating muscle in your chest, but the emotional seat of your being. We talk about heartache in our lives. We talk about the quick moving sharp tongue of a friend or a stranger that lacerates our emotional core. We talk about the heart pain of constant emotional abuse. We hear people speak of years of abuse and how they reacted to it. We think the only reaction is the one we see when they finally break free of the abuse or silence the abuser, but their entire life is a reaction. It is a conditioned reaction where they often shut down parts of their emotion. (Please understand that I am in no way endorsing enduring emotional and physical abuse in a relationship.) I am talking about a reaction to suffering. We all react.

We have to understand this fact about the life of Jesus Christ. Nothing He did was a reaction to His environment. His whole life was a plan. Nothing that happened to him was unexpected by Him. The Word tells us that He knows the end from the beginning. (Isaiah 46.10) from the foundation of the world, He knew the order of the days. The Word tells us that He was the Lamb slain from the foundation of the earth. (Revelation 13.8) Can you even fathom this? As He created this world and formed the mountains and the hills, He knew He would robe Himself in flesh and die on one of those hills.

His life was ordered. When we look at His existence, we must realize this was the path He chose. He did not have to die. He did not have to save His creation. It has been said numerous times in a variety of ways that it was not the nails that held Him to the cross of Calvary. It was His love for us. It was His love for me. It was His love for you.

That love, compelled Him to give His life for his creation. The omniscience of God meant He was not taken by surprise by Calvary. It was His goal. Calvary was not the unexpected reaction of humanity on the life of Jesus. It was ordained by His love.

When we, the body of Christ, possess that love, we will not react in haste. Reaction is based on past experiences and present circumstances. That is not to say that it isn’t expected in us. It is not a judgment, per say. It is an observation. We know yesterday. We know today. It is all we have in the realm of our knowledge upon which to base a decision about what to do.

Within our brains are the Amygdalae. They perform a primary role in the processing and memory of emotional reactions. The amygdala is associated with or controls:

· Arousal

· Controls Autonomic Responses Associated with Fear

· Emotional Responses

· Hormonal Secretions

I am primarily concerned in this study with only one of those aspects of its function. I am looking at the emotional responses. I want to put this in terms that ate readily understandable. Our brains are like a giant super computer. They store vast amounts of information. If we see it, hear it, smell it, feel it, or taste it, it is stored in our brain in the form of memory. When we are confronted with a circumstance, our brain goes through our memory to decide how to respond to that circumstance. The amygdala determines our emotional response based on previous responses and effect of said responses. Then, the amygdala sends responses in the form of neurons to the Hypothalamus. The Hypothalamus:

· Controls Autonomic Functions

· Emotions

· Endocrine Functions

· Homeostasis

· Motor Functions

· Regulates Food and Water Intake

· Regulates Sleep Wake Cycle

Based on the stimulus received the body reacts. This is where our fight or flight response is determined. This increases our heart rate, increases our sweat production, and alters our breathing, depending on the amygdale and hypothalamus.

The point to see here is that these responses or reactions are based primarily on past experiences (memory) and present circumstances (stimulus.) It is human nature to react in haste. It is a flooding of endorphins or testosterone predicated on the functions of our brains.

Paul tells us in Corinthians that the love we receive from God does not react in haste.

Isaiah tells us that God’s thought are not our thoughts and God’s ways are not our ways. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My thoughts higher than your thoughts,” God says.

Why is this?

Let’s look at the origin of our thoughts and our ways. As we explained earlier, everything we do is based on our experiences and our circumstance. This is all we know. We do not know tomorrow. We have dreams for tomorrow. We have hopes for tomorrow. What we do not have is knowledge of tomorrow. Therefore, all of our thinking and ways are based on this two dimensional type of thinking.

Let’s look at Gods thoughts and God’s ways. As explained earlier also, nothing that happened in the life of Christ was unexpected. God knows the past. God knows the present. God knows the future. God knows yesterday, today, and tomorrow. His ways are not based on a reaction. His ways are not based in hasty or rash decisions. God moves by virtue of His complete knowing of past, present, and future events.

When we have the love of God shed abroad in our hearts, we will have the trust of that knowledge as well. When we know that our lives are directed by a God that loves us and knows tomorrow, we can trust in His plan and not react in haste.

We think so often that when we talk about reacting in haste, we are concerned only with a word spoken in anger, or a lashing out in anger. This is far from the only problem with operating in haste. Every day we are called on to make decisions that will affect the rest of our lives. God implores us to give due diligence and Godly consideration to these decisions.

Yes, Godly love can hold an angry tongue (the last member to yield.)

Yes, Godly love can still a violent outburst.

However, there is so much more to the calm serenity that the love of God gives us than just controlling our temper. While, controlling our temper is vital and losing it is detrimental to our Godly profession, the calmness of God’s love goes far beyond only it.

Have you ever been cut off in traffic by a bad driver? Sure, you have. How did you react? If you are like many drivers, you reacted in anger and sped up and rode the bumper of the offender. You might have even cut into the other lane and passed that driver and cut back into the lane. What have you done? You have become that which offended you. You have allowed an offence to make you an offence. Your amygdala and your hypothalamus are in concert. They are flooding your body with testosterone (yes, even if you are a woman,) and you are overriding the love of God that should be governing your life.

Now, just suppose, in your effort to even the score, you cause the other driver to lose control and wreck. There is a loss of property and possibly life. Does this put into perspective the cost of rash and hasty decisions? Does the fact that no-one lost control and there was no property or life loss change the damage of such actions?

Love does not react in haste.

In the Garden of Gethsemane, when the soldiers and the servants of the priests came to arrest Jesus, Peter reacted and cut off the ear of one of the servants, Malchus. Jesus tells Peter to put away his sword. He says, “This is the cup my Father has given me. Shall I not drink it?” Jesus touched the ear of the servant and restored it.

At this crucial part on His path toward Calvary, Jesus was still governed by His love for lost humanity.

Love, prayerfully considers while humanity reacts in haste.

Love does not vaunt itself.

Next: Love is not puffed up.

Love: Part Three

This is the third installment in this series on love.

When Peter stood with the rest of the Apostles on the day of Pentecost and preached the first sermon of the newly opened dispensation of grace, he spoke about Jesus and who He was, why He came, and what was to happen next. In his entire short sermon, Peter never once used the word ‘love’. However, love was all over his words. It was God’s love for His creation that brought about the events on the hill called Golgotha. It was love for mankind that held Him to the cross. It was love that restrained His lips from calling out to twelve legions of angels to rescue Him. It was love that called Judas a ‘friend’ after his kiss of identification betrayed Jesus.

We cannot be the Children of God and not have love. The Word asks how we can love God whom we have not seen if we do not love our brothers whom we have seen. Love is a foundational part of serving God. Love floods the life of the new convert as, for the first time in their lives; they feel pure and unadulterated love. It is a love without any ulterior motive. It is a completely giving love.

It is only once we understand and experience this type of love that we can truly love as we were intended to love. I do not seek to undervalue anyone’s love for their spouse or children. However, human love is tainted by humanity. The very nature within us that yearns to be loved, corrupts the love we covet and express. It is not a criticism of human love, but merely an observation. This is not a jaded observation. It is an observation having felt and experienced that ‘agape’ love of God, firsthand.

John said it in simplicity. “For God so loved ..”

Paul said in his first letter to the church at Corinth, “Though I speak with tongues; though I prophesy; though I understand mysteries and all knowledge; though I have faith to move mountains; though I give all my goods to the poor; though I give my body to be burned; if I don’t have love, it profits me nothing.”

To this end, to understand God’s love that we must manifest, he tells us that love suffers long. Love is kind.

• Does not envy

By definition, Envy (also called invidiousness) is best defined as an emotion that "occurs when a person lacks another's (perceived) superior quality, achievement, or possession and either desires it or wishes that the other lacked it.” (Journal of Personality and Social Psychology)

"Envy" and "jealousy" are often used interchangeably, but in correct usage, they stand for two different distinct emotions. In proper usage, jealousy is the fear of losing something that one possesses to another person (a loved one in the prototypical form), while envy is the pain or frustration caused by another person having something that one does not have oneself. Usually envy involves wanting the beauty, wealth, or socioeconomic status of another individual. Envy and jealousy result from different situations and are distinct emotional experiences.⁽¹⁾ Both envy and jealousy are etymologically related to schadenfreude, the rejoicing at, or taking joy in, or getting pleasure from the misfortunes of others. ⁽²⁾⁽³⁾

⁽¹⁾Smith, Richard H. and Kim, Sung Hee. Psychological Bulletin, 2007, Vol. 133, No. 1, 46-64.)

⁽²⁾Bailey, Nathan (1737). Universal Etymological English Dictionary. London,

⁽³⁾ Bailey, Nathan (1751). Dictionarium Britannicum. London.)

Love does not envy. How is it that love does not envy?

Love rejoices in the blessings of others without feeling pangs of coveting. Allow me to explain the difference between wanting and coveting. It is fine for you to want the blessings that others have. Coveting is when you want not the same blessings, but the actually blessing. You want it at their expense. You want it to be taken from them and given to you. This is coveting. Coveting is the cousin of envy. Envy is the desire to have something even at the expense of others not having it. It is a fine line. It is a line that love keeps us from crossing.

Paul said, “I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.”

He was telling the church at Galatia that there were carnal things about him that had to be crucified. He had to keep under his body and bring it into subjection. In his letter to the church at Corinth, which we have been reading from, he tells them that there is carnality among them and this carnality is leading to envying and strife. I can tell you, where there is envying, there will be strife. There will be a contentious spirit. There will be a spirit which works against the spirit of love. God’s love does not allow for envying.

James 4:5 “Do ye think that the scripture saith in vain, The spirit that dwelleth in us lusteth to envy?”

James clearly tells us that being human is to be envious. It is a part of our natures that must be brought into subjection by the Spirit of God.

Countless philosophers and poets have spent time and words trying to surmise the meaning or definition of love. Untold numbers of young and old hearts alike have tried in vain to express the depths of their love to their lifelong mate or their flame of the week, but to no avail. I will not pretend to understand the depths and heights of love. I will tell you that the Word is clear. God is love.

Paul stated in the earlier quoted scripture, that he, his humanity which seeks to know love and fails, must be crucified with Christ. The life he now lives, at the time of the writing, he lives through Christ, and it is this living, that allows him to know love, and to live above envy.

• There is much said in the Bible about envy.

"We are jealous of our own; we are envious of another man's possessions. Jealousy fears to lose what it has; envy is pained at seeing another have" (Crabb's English Synonyms)

The power of envy is stated in Proverbs 27.4: "Wrath is cruel, and anger is outrageous; but who is able to stand before envy?”

It is one thing to play with fire when you reasonably think you can harness the power and control the destructive nature of it. We do it all the time in the natural. We have harnessed the power of fire and use it to heat our homes. We use it to create electrical power by producing steam to turn large turbines at power plants. It is another thing all together to try to play with something over which one has no control. Someone wisely stated in a song many years ago that sin will take you father than you want to go. The same is true of envy. Solomon warns us that it is a hard thing to stand before envy.

Its evil effects are depicted in Job 5.2 “For wrath killeth the foolish man, and envy slayeth the silly one.” Proverbs 14.30 tells us “A sound heart is the life of the flesh: but envy the rottenness of the bones.”

Do you see the attempt of Solomon again as he tells us that envy is the rottenness of the bones? He wants us to know that envy attacks the core of our being. It is not a light scratch to be treated with Neosporin and a Band-Aid. It is not something that will heal itself in time. It is a deep penetrating wound that will destroy the vessel which foolishly seeks to contain it. It requires a radical operation of the Spirit of God. It requires the Sword of the Spirit, the discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. Envy is simply one of the things that love is not. It is everything that love is not. Envy, unchecked will lead to hatred and the death of a soul.

Envy and jealousy led to the crucifixion of Jesus Christ.

Matthew 27.18 “For he knew that for envy they had delivered him.”

Mark 15.10 “For he knew that the chief priests had delivered him for envy.”

It is one of "the works of the flesh"

Galatians 5:19-21

19. Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,

20. Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,

21. Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.

Paul states in his letter to the church at Rome that in his flesh is no good thing. Whatever goodness is in him is by and through the Spirit of God that dwells within him. He says that he sees a law in that his flesh wars against his spirit. He further states as quoted above, that he keep under his body and brings it into subjection, lest when he has preached to other, he might become a castaway. These works of the flesh, he warns us against. One of the works he warns us about is envying.

Romans 1:28-32

28. And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient;

29. Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers,

30. Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents,

31. Without understanding, covenantbreakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful:

32. Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.

Telling the church at Rome about those that don’t like to keep God in their knowledge Paul declared they will be given over to a reprobate mind. Paul is stating that those whom God dealt with continually, but just a continually rejected the knowledge of God, He turned away from their mind and no long sent His conviction to rend their hearts. They would no longer be convicted in their heart for the wrong doing that would damn their souls. He declared they would be filled with unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, and maliciousness. They would be full of envy, which would lead to murders, debates, deceit, malignity and whisperings. The love that comes from above does not envy. It is the work of the flesh. It is the ingredient and product of the reprobate mind.

Christian believers are earnestly warned against envying.

Romans 13.13 “Let us walk honestly, as in the day; not in rioting and drunkenness, not in chambering and wantonness, not in strife and envying.”

1 Corinthians 3.3 “For ye are yet carnal: for whereas there is among you envying, and strife, and divisions, are ye not carnal, and walk as men?”

1^st Peter 2:1 “Wherefore laying aside all malice, and all guile, and hypocrisies, and envies, and all evil speakings,”

In Kings, Ahab the king envied the vineyard of Naboth. He sought to buy it, but Naboth, being bound by the Word of God to never sell that which was given to him by God, refused. Ahab pouted and his wife, Jezebel conceived a plan to gain the vineyard of Ahab’s envy. She set in motion plans and hired liars to bring about the stoning death of Naboth. Once he was dead, Ahab laid claim to the vineyard of his desire.

God spoke to Elijah to go to Ahab and to tell him that his and his wife’s evil did not go unseen. He accused him of the murder of Naboth. God spoke through Elijah to tell Ahab that the dogs would lick up his blood in the same spot where that licked up the blood of Naboth. He further said that the dogs would also eat Jezebel by the wall of Jezreel.

These actions and judgments were the consequences of envy. Envy led Ahab down a path that led to his own destruction. When we are envious, we are aiding Satan in the destruction of our own soul. Envy is a poison that is as dangerous or more so to the vessel that contains it than the object of the envy.

Love does not envy.

It would be easy to stop here and state emphatically that the Bible clearly tells us that ‘envy’ is part of the works of the flesh and must be abandoned by the believers. No good thing comes from envy. It is commonly associated with strife in the Word of God. Where you read that there is envy, there is also strife.

The questions are: How do we recognize envy in its early stages? And how do we stop it?

As stated in the beginning of this Study, envy is the desire to have at the expense of others. It is the emotion we feel when we perceive that someone has something, physical or otherwise, that we desire or wish they lacked. Aristotle defined envy as ‘the pain caused by the good fortune of others’. Envy is the improper equalizer.

As I have spoken in times past about the phrase ‘Whosoever Will” in how ‘whosoever’ is the great equalizer. When God spoke and said, “Whosever will, let him come,” He made us all equal. One’s health has no bearing on the call of God; nor does one’s wealth or social standing. We are all equal at the foot of the cross. Envy seeks to equalize by tearing down the good fortune or just rewards of others.

Love rejoices in the good fortune of others whether we enjoy the sane fortune or not. Love rejoices in the blessings of others. Envy recognizes that the blessing may not be legally wrought by the person envying and therefore begrudges the blessings of others.

When you hear of the blessings of others, and there is that tinge of anger because it didn’t happen to you, you are in the primary stage of envy.

Paul said that he was content in whatever state he found himself. There is nothing wrong with wanting more out of life. There is nothing wrong with a work ethic born of wanting more in life. Earning a day’s wage for a day’s work is one of the foundations of a healthy self esteem. I do not want to infer that envy only happens to those of low self esteem. It can happen to anyone that is not safeguarding against it. We must be ever vigilant against the works of the flesh.

How do we stop it?

Paul said, “I am crucified with Christ.” He stated, “I keep under my body. I bring it under subjection.” We have to allow the love of God to lead us to the place where we can be victorious. That is not always the place we want to be. The Bible tells us that Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness where He fasted for forty day and nights and was tempted by the devil.

We must be willing to be led to the place where God can minister to us and make the changes necessary. We must be willing to be on the potter’s wheel. There are times that we must be broken by the love of God. We must be remade. When we are remade in the image of Christ, we will put envy away.

Envy creates a false face and anything false is a lie. God is the truth. A lie is the opposite of truth and therefore the opposite of God and His Will. There is a word we use to express our honesty. That word is ‘sincere’. When we claim we are being sincere, we are claiming to be dealing truthfully in our emotion. The word ‘sincere’ is reported to come from two Latin words, ‘sin’ and ‘crescere’; ‘Sin’ meaning ‘one’ and ‘crescere’ meaning ‘to grow’. This is taken to mean ‘one growth, or not mixed. This means ‘pure’ Envy is a convoluted emotion. It presents as one thing and a completely different thing smolders beneath. Envy is like flattery. Flattery is false praise. Praise is truth. Flattery is the lie. Envy is false sincerity.

Love does not wear the face of sincerity and harbor envy in its heart. This is not the love that the Child of God possesses. If your heart is filled with envy, it cannot be filled with love. If your heart is filled with love, it cannot be filled with envy.

The Word tells us that where there is envying and strife, there is confusion and every evil work. (James 3.16) Everything is unsettled and agitated. There is no mutual confidence; there is no union of plan and effort; there is no co-operation in promoting a common object; there is no stability in any plan; for a purpose, though for good, formed by one portion, is defeated by another. Envying is the enemy of ‘one growth’.

Love does not envy.

Next: Love does not vaunt itself.

Love .. Part Two

This is the second installment in a series on Love. The Bible is filled with stories and examples of love. The scriptures themselves have been called, “God’s love letter to man.” However, in today’s society, we hear less and less about love every day. Turn on any news channel or watch any networks news broadcast and you will see a world filled with hate, intolerance, and violence. Yet, thrust into the middle of that is the Body of Christ, the church. Jesus tells us that He sends us forth as sheep among the wolves. He admonishes us to be wise as serpents and harmless as doves. We are a city set on a hill that cannot be hidden. We are to be shining examples of God’s everlasting unchanging love. In this series of studies based on Paul’s description of love to the church at Corinth, we seek to understand the characteristics of a people governed, not by fear or hatred, but by love and assurance. John told us that we would be known by our love.

It has been quoted by many, and I don’t know who said it originally, that people will forget what you say to them and what you do for them, but they will never forget how you make them feel. It is the duty of every Child of God to make the lost feel loved.

This series is about Love, as a fundamental part of the Christian life. I fully realize that there are many more aspects of Christian living, and it is not my desire to de-emphasis their importance, however, love is an essential foundational part of the life of the believer.

The Word tells us that we will know a tree by the fruit it bears. We are not to be judges of men, but we are called to be fruit inspectors. In this, it is important to notice when the writer talks about the fruit of the Spirit, he first mentions love.

As stated in the first installment, there is in the Gospels, the story of Jesus at the fig tree. Jesus, returning to the city of Jerusalem; saw a fig tree in a public place slightly off the road. It was full of leaves and therefore, the expectation was that there would be also fruit. The characteristic of the fig tree is that it bears fruit prior to or at the same time as it bears leaves. Seeing the leaves made one assume there would be fruit as well. Upon inspection, there was no fruit on the tree. Jesus cursed the tree. He caused it to bear no more fruit forever. The tree then withered away.

When we profess to be a Christian (present leaves,) we are expected to have the fruit as well.

The purpose of this Bible Study is not to answer questions, only, but to cause us to ask them as well. It is to cause us to inspect our own fruit. We have the leaves, but do we have the fruit. We call ourselves Christians, but do we really have the goods? We have a Godly imperative not to judge others, but the same Word tells us to judge ourselves.

Simply stated, this study is about LOVE.

John 13:34-35 “A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.”

We wrote about the long suffering aspect of the love we are to possess in part one. In this second part we will discuss the kindness of love.

· Is kind

Love does not react in anger. Love does not react in rage.

A polliwog is the wholly aquatic larval stage of the frog or toad. A polliwog will grow to become an adult frog or toad.

We readily recognize anger and rage. Do we, however, recognize the polliwog of rage and anger? Can we see the beginnings of these undesirable reactions?

Love is kind. It does not react in anger in its various stages. Anger begins quite simply as annoyance or irritation. Let me turn a phrase here to see if we can shine a clearer light on it. We have all heard the phrase, “that rubs me the wrong way.” We are saying, when we use this phrase, that it is something contrary to how we want or enjoy something to react with us. I am going to use this in a purely physical sense for a moment.

You buy a new pair of shoes which you like. The first time you wear them, you notice that are not as form fitting as your old shoes. There are places that the new shoes don’t fit precisely and therefore rub just a bit. They rub you in a place where you are not accustomed to being rubbed. At first, it is just an irritation. It is a minor annoyance. However, as time passes, that irritation becomes a blister. It has progressed from a minor bother to a moderate displeasure. That shoe has rubbed you the wrong way. Given time, the blister will open if the friction does not change. Then you will have an open sore. This can lead to an infection and even possibly life threatening episode. All of this is because something rubbed you the wrong way.

Most often, we recognize the first sign of tenderness and take action to prevent the rest of the series of events. Do we, however, recognize them when it comes to how our love or lack thereof reacts to a negative stimulus? The tenderness and blister are signs that something is not as it should be. Irritation and annoyance should be equally recognized as signs that something is not as it should be.

Love is kind. Love is like the mortar between the bricks in a brick wall. Sometimes that love holds us together and sometimes that love holds us apart. Love allows you to be different than me. Love allows that everything on you will not fit everything on me, but it is OK. Love allows the sinner, the antipathy of God’s holiness, to come to an altar and kneel before Him. If we, by our unkindness, stand in the way of a sinner’s path to God, how can we expect God to honor us or our desires? How can we claim to exhibit the love which God has, when we cannot love or show love to those whom He loves?

Love is kind. It does not build walls of words between us and others. Love builds bridges. Love spans the gap. Love prompts the sacrifice.

Love is the seed of kindness. If there is, therefore, no kindness, what is the seed buried in your heart?

When Joshua and the armies of the Lord went to do battle against the small city of AI, following the resounding defeat of Jericho, they were utterly defeated. They were set to flight. Joshua goes to his tent and enquires of God. He, sort of, tries to guilt God. He actually accuses God.

Joshua 7.6-9

“And Joshua rent his clothes, and fell to the earth upon his face before the ark of the LORD until the eventide, he and the elders of Israel, and put dust upon their heads. And Joshua said, Alas, O Lord GOD, wherefore hast thou at all brought this people over Jordan, to deliver us into the hand of the Amorites, to destroy us? would to God we had been content, and dwelt on the other side Jordan! O Lord, what shall I say, when Israel turneth their backs before their enemies! For the Canaanites and all the inhabitants of the land shall hear of it, and shall environ us round, and cut off our name from the earth: and what wilt thou do unto thy great name?”

He says, “Lord, what are we supposed to do now? Once this word gets out, other armies will set in array against us. What am I supposed to say now that Israel has turned their backs and ran?”

God spoke to Joshua and told him to get off of his face. He told him of Israel’s sin in not doing as commanded in Jericho. The command was to destroy it utterly. Yet, someone did not obey. Someone took something that was accursed and hid it amongst their stuff.

The subsequent search revealed that Achan had taken gold and silver and a goodly Babylonian garment and hid it in the heart of his tent. This thing, this accursed thing in the heart of a tent in the camp of the Israelites brought the mighty to a low place. Once it and the offender were removed, the power of God was restored to the armies of the Israelites.

What secret hatred have you hidden in your heart? What unkindness have you allowed to fester in your life? What prejudice is lurking and refusing to come to the submission of the love of God in your life? What seed is buried in your heart? What seed is choking the kindness of the love of God?

Love extends the hand of God’s mercy. We say, as the scripture says, that love is kind, but we could just as well say that love is kind in its mercy. The root of the word for kindness means to provide what is necessary. When you, a sinner, first approached the King of Kings and Lord of Lords (Hallelujah,) what was needful? What did you need to stand in the presence of God Almighty? Mercy, held in His kindness, provided by His love made you able to stand in His presence.

This same kindness is what we are to exhibit if men are to know that we are His disciples.

There is a word that has come to express something totally different that it should. We shudder at the use of the word because of the connotations now commonly associated with it. That word is ‘tolerance.’ Certain groups today had tried (with some success) to make the word mean acceptance. I can tolerate your sinful nature without accepting it. Kindness allows me to be tolerant without being accepting. Tolerance is accepting that every (whosoever) individual (will) has the right to live life as they choose, without condoning that choice as the right choice.

If you choose to live life as a sinner, I accept that it is your choice and your right to choose, but I do not accept that it is the right thing to do.

Love does not build a wall of intolerance between us and then wonder why I cannot reach you with the doctrine of salvation. I may repeat this several times within this Bible study, but love builds bridges, not walls.

There is a story "Old Joe and the Carpenter." It is considered a signature story of Pleasant DeSpain's.

Once, two brothers who lived on adjoining farms fell into conflict. It was the first serious rift in 40 years of farming side by side, sharing machinery, and trading labor and goods as needed without a hitch. Then the long collaboration fell apart. It began with a small misunderstanding, grew into a major difference, and finally it exploded into an exchange of bitter words followed by weeks of silence.

One morning there was a knock on John's door. He opened it to find a man with a carpenter's toolbox. "I'm looking for a few days work," he said. "Perhaps you would have a few small jobs here and there. Could I help you?" "Yes," said John, "I do have a job for you. Look across the creek at that farm. That's my neighbor. In fact, it's my younger brother. Last week there was a meadow between us and he took his bulldozer to the river levee and now there is a creek between us. Well, he may have done this to spite me, but I'll go him one better. See that pile of lumber curing by the barn? I want you to build me a fence -- an 8-foot fence -- so I won't need to see his place anymore. That should cool him down, anyhow."

The carpenter said, "I think I understand the situation. Show me the nails and the post-hole digger and I'll be able to do a job that pleases you." Now John, the older brother, had to go to town for supplies, so he helped the carpenter get the materials ready and then he was off for the day. The carpenter worked hard all that day measuring, sawing, nailing. About sunset when the farmer returned, the carpenter had just finished his job. The farmer's eyes opened wide, his jaw dropped. There was no fence there at all. It was a bridge-a bridge stretching from one side of the creek to the other! It was a fine piece of work, handrails and all.

John looked up and the neighbor, his younger brother, was coming across, his hand outstretched. "You are quite a fellow to build this bridge after all I've said and done." The two brothers stood at each end of the bridge, and then they met in the middle, taking each other's hand. They turned to see the carpenter hoist his toolbox on his shoulder. "No, wait! Stay a few days. I've a lot of other projects for you," said John. "I'd love to stay on," the carpenter said, "but, I have many more bridges to build.

Love is kind. Love builds bridges.

There was a time that we called Baseball the American Pastime. America has a new pastime these days. It is easy to see, especially now, in the waning days before the election. The new American Pastime is Bashing. We bash people everywhere. There are no special skills needed to do it, either. You don’t even need intelligence. All you need is an opinion, informed or otherwise, and a bully pulpit. It is all over the airwaves. It is in every media. Politicians have perfected the art of bashing opponents. Every detail, regardless of how innocuous, is fodder for the basher.

Everyone slams someone. No one is safe from the unexpected onslaught of the basher. Everyone is a victim and everyone is a perpetrator.

We laugh at the hilarity of what goes by the nom-de-plum ‘professional wrestling.’ These athletes get in the ring and get into each other’s faces and hurl their epithets with reckless abandon. The objects of their ‘bashing’ stand and take it until it is their turn with the microphone in their hand and the camera on their face. They go back and forth, seeming at the straining edge of coming to blows. However, there is a method to their madness. They are provoking, not each other, but the audience with such fervor that they dare not miss the conclusion in the ring. As a somewhat intelligent thinking adult, I laugh at this marketing technique. I laugh at the humor of it. I laugh at the genius of it. I laugh at the control it has on some or most of its audience. More than that, however, I cringe at the faces in the crowd, as our children learn this behavior.

Now, it would be simple enough to explain to a child that this is not real. This is an act. These are athletic actors. This is merely for the sake of entertainment. As usual though, there is an ‘however’.

We are in the heat of the political election season. The men and women we will chose to make laws that govern us are vying for our vote. We are in the throes of bashing season. Each proponent of the election systems seeks for and finds the worst of their opponent. They find them at their lowest and worst moments and broadcast it with a smug superiority.

If we, Christians, are not careful, we are drawn into the bashing. We will find ourselves touting the banter of our political favorite without regard to the truth it holds or doesn’t hold. Have we lied if we are merely repeating the slanted truth told by our party favorite? Have we promoted the weaponry of the enemy when we forward the emails sent to us without even trying to verify their authenticity or honesty? Because of the endless bashing, we are no longer left with choosing the better of two good opponents. We are left with the choice of the lesser of two evils.

Luke 9:52-55

52. And sent messengers before his face: and they went, and entered into a village of the Samaritans, to make ready for him.

53. And they did not receive him, because his face was as though he would go to Jerusalem.

54. And when his disciples James and John saw this, they said, Lord, wilt thou that we command fire to come down from heaven, and consume them, even as Elias did?

55. But he turned, and rebuked them, and said, Ye know not what manner of spirit ye are of.

James and John, two disciples of Jesus, stepped outside the message of love and were rebuked by Jesus. What are we doing when we get caught up in the politics of corruption and hurl volleys of hatred and lies? What spirit are we manifesting? Of what origin are our words?

Let me enlighten you about the wall that hatred builds. The darts and arrows of the enemies of our lives cannot get through, this is true. However, the poison of hated cannot get out. It taints everything within the walls. Hatred paints over the windows so no light comes in. Darkness prevails inside the walls of hatred. This is not the work of the Spirit of God. This is the machination of the enemy.

Another study I am working on involves a parable in Matthew. It is the parable of the wheat and tares. After Jesus has told the parable to the crowd and they have dispersed, his followers ask Him the meaning of the parable. I will save that for that study, but one of the things he clarified was who the enemy was that had sown the bastard wheat in the field. He said, “The enemy is Satan.” It doesn’t get much clearer than that.

Nothing Satan does, regardless of how it appears, is for your benefit. Let me make a simple comparison. Let’s say that you had to be at the airport for a flight to a paradise vacation. On the way, a friend stops you and insists that he treat you to an expensive meal. Then, he prolongs and prolongs the meal until you miss your flight. The meal was fantastic. However, was he being a friend in treating you to this wonderful expensive meal at the expense of your flight to paradise?

Regardless of how benevolent or generous the offer of Satan seems, it is wise to remember that he is your enemy. His pleasures last only a season. If you miss your flight to paradise, you have gained little and lost all. Satan is your enemy.

His spirit is the spirit of unkindness. His is the spirit of bashing. His is the spirit of hatred and intolerance.

God’s Spirit is the origin of kindness.

Love is kind.

Next: Love does not envy.

Love .. Part One

I started working on this study some weeks ago. It was going to be a simple study on a familiar passage of scripture. As I began working on it, it began to grow. I try to keep my posted Bible Studies in the 3000 word range. This one quickly approached that and at last count, while it is still unfinished, it contains over 10,000 words. I became obvious that it was going to have to be split into a series of Bible Studies. The problem with that was, because it was going to be a series, I concentrated less on it and more on smaller studies. I was talking via Skype to my nephew in Italy, and the conversation came to this Bible Study, which he and I had discussed previously. I told him that I was going to have to start posting the series to give myself more motivation to finish the rest of the study.

That being said, this is the first installment of this series.

This series is about Love, as a fundamental part of the Christian life. I fully realize that there are many more aspects of Christian living, and it is not my desire to de-emphasis their importance, however, love is a essential foundational part of the life of the believer.

The Word tells us that we will know a tree by the fruit it bears. We are not to be judges of men, but we are called to be fruit inspectors. In this, it is important to notice when the writer talks about the fruit of the Spirit, he first mentions love. Paul continues the list with joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness and temperance. The first three speak to our character as an inward state, the second three speak of character in expression to man, and the third three speak of character in expression toward God. While there is initial and immediate evidence of the new birth, there is continuing sustainable evidence as well. This evidence is in the fruit.

In the Gospels, the Scripture records the story of Jesus at the fig tree. The story goes that Jesus, returning to the city of Jerusalem; saw a fig tree in a public place slightly off the road. It was full of leaves and therefore, the expectation was that there would be also fruit. The characteristic of the fig tree is that it bears fruit prior to or at the same time as it bears leaves. Seeing the leaves made one assume there would be fruit as well. Upon inspection, there was no fruit on the tree. Jesus cursed the tree. He caused it to bear no more fruit forever. The tree then withered away.

When we profess to be a Christian (present leaves,) we are expected to have the fruit as well.

The purpose of this Bible Study is not to answer questions, only, but to cause us to ask them as well. It is to cause us to inspect our own fruit. We have the leaves, but do we have the fruit. We call ourselves Christians, but do we really have the goods? We have a Godly imperative not to judge others, but the same Word tells us to judge ourselves.

Simply stated, this study is about LOVE.

John 13:34-35 “A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.”

Jesus is telling the early church that things are going to be different than before. There is a new standard by which they are to conduct themselves. There is a new way of dealing with those within and those without. He says that we are to love with the same manner of love that He had. How does our method of love compare to the way God loved all those around Him?

While He walked on the earth, how did He treat those around him?

I see and hear WWJD all over the place. I sometimes ask myself if all of those that display the “What Would Jesus Do” in stickers and bracelets, really know what Jesus would do, or are exhibiting what Jesus would do.

Part of the problem is that, we, the members of the church, sometimes, are not showing forth the love of God properly. How do we treat our brothers of like faith? How are we treating those living around us? How are we treating those that are afar off?

Now, you may ask, how should I be treating those of like faith and those not of like faith?

Good question.

What does the Word tell us in regard to how we treat others, in the faith or not?

Jesus tells us that we are to love one another as He loves us.

We must ask ourselves, what does love do or not do?

The Word tells us about love. It is imperative that we know what the Word says about love. We learn about love as we grow by the love shown around us. Most prejudices can be traced to how we were taught to love as a child. We tend to mirror the love we knew. While this is not always the case, it is more often than not true.

I want to look at 1st Corinthians 13.4-8 for this study.

Most often, these scriptures are read, paraphrased, or quoted at weddings. However, what it says about love is true outside the wedding ceremony as well. These words were not Paul’s letter to a couple about to be married, but rather his letter to the church. Paul, through the unction of the Holy Ghost, was telling us, the body of Christ, how we were to love. If we are to be like Christ, then we must show evidence of this kind of love. We have a justice system requiring a ‘prima facie’ case. This is from the Latin for ‘at first face’. In most legal proceedings, one party has a burden of proof, which requires it to present prima facie evidence for all of the essential facts in its case. If they cannot, its claim may be dismissed without any need for a response by other parties.

I have heard it stated thusly, “If you were accused of being a Christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you? However, the prima facie evidence of our Christianity lies in our expression of God’s love within us. When the love of God echoes through us, then the world will know we are His children. John 13.35 says they will know us “if ye have (echo) love, one to another.” It is this echoing of love that Paul talks about when he tells the church at Corinth how their love is to appear, and what characteristics their love must possess. We must understand this love. It is the measure by which we will be judged by those around us.

It is to this end that this Bible Study is aimed; that we may know the love we must possess and they we may recognize when secularism comes into play in our expression of love.

Love:

· Suffers long

Proverbs tells us that hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all sins. This is not just the love a man has for his wife and vice versa. This goes far beyond the vows between a man and a woman. We may be able to understand it looking at it in the constraints of a marriage, but the principle cannot be contained therein. We can readily see that in a marriage, there are going to be differences. There are going to be differing opinions. A marriage consists of two people coming from two different directions, with two separate ways of doing things, and two diverse ways of thinking about things, being tossed in a locked room and being told to make it work. If there is hatred there, it will stir up every manner of strife imaginable. Both sides will drag the entire lineage of the other into the fray. Friend, get a woman to hate you and she will talk about your sainted grandmother like she was a demon straight from the depths of the pit. Ladies, get a man to hate you and your father, that champion of provision in your life, will be the most shiftless slew-footed derelict that ever walked.

On the other hand, let love reign and all those things, whether they are truth or not, will be covered in that love.

Love suffers long. A husband that loves his wife will give her time to come around to the right way of thinking. A wife that loves her husband will give him time to get all those foolish notions out of his head.

Love suffers long. We will not be so quick to judge and accuse when our heart is ruled by love. A woman taken in the very act of adultery was brought to Jesus. There was no question of her guilt. There was no reasonable doubt. There was no room for variance or circumstance. She was caught. The law on the matter was clear. The punishment was obvious. Those that brought her had already chosen the stones they were going to throw. In my mind, I could see them, turning the stones in their hands as they awaited Jesus to speak.

Jesus was God, manifested in the flesh. This sin was an abomination to God. The un-holiness of this act was in direct conflict with the holiness of God. Logically, the answer was obvious. However, there was something working that the throng did not expect. For, while Jesus embodied the holiness of God, He also embodied the love of God. Without losing a speck of holiness, God spoke out in love.

“He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.”

He returned to stooping and writing on the ground. The throng, the gathered angry righteous crowd was stunned into inaction. There is much supposition as to what Jesus was writing in the sand, if He were writing anything in particular at all. The writer recording this encounter did not record anything concerning the scribbling of Jesus. However, what Jesus said was enough. The stones chosen for throwing were dropped on the ground. From the oldest to the youngest, the crowd dispersed, until only Jesus and the woman remained. “Woman, where are your accusers? Is there no one who condemned you?” “No man, Lord.” “Neither do I condemn you. Go and sin no more.”

His love did not excuse her sin. His love did not deny that it happened. His love suffered the assault to His holiness. His love corrected the sin. (Go and sin no more.)

Think for a moment about your child. Suppose they did something wrong. How would you react to those around you wanting to kill them over the wrongful action? How would you react to someone wanting to hurt someone you love, even if the hurt was a justifiable action?

Now, how would you react if they were just calling them hurtful names? How would you react if they used hateful speech against them, using inflammatory epithets to extol their point and capitalize on crowd reaction?

Would you say the accuser is exhibiting the love that God says we are to have?

How do you think God reacts when we, the claimants of His grace, hurl hurtful epithets at sinners, whom he loves?

That day, with the woman taken in the act, the crowd unwittingly brought her to the one against whom she had sinned. They were spurred by a hypocritical righteous indignation. The woman had not sinned against them. They were not without sin and therefore not in any position to adjudicate guilt or pass sentence. Her act offended their sensibilities. They were affronted by her brazenness. It was not the act of adultery that riled them, but the act of being caught. They were indignant because of the openness of her sin. We react to the openness of some sins while the hidden sins of a hating heart are ignored if they do not flaunt themselves.

This crowd, wrong in motive, wrong in action, wrong in desire, came to the only righteous one. Standing before the only one with any right to examine, judge, or punish, this woman found a long suffering love. This woman came in contact with the only thing that will change the sinner’s heart. She came to a long suffering love. Love .. suffers long.

This is the love that we must possess or that we must allow to possess us. We must allow the agape love of God to replace the phileo love of man. One of the primary differences in the two loves is in the distance each will travel. The phileo love of man will go so far. It will travel to a point. We can site great examples of man’s love for man. There is a limit to have far man’s love will go.

The love of God will travel far greater distances. The Word tells us this much and more. In his letter to the church at Rome, Paul states, “For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die. But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.”

How many of us could state without a doubt that there is someone we know that would be willing to die for us? How many of us have friends that we would give our live to defend? We like to think that we would give our lives in any effort to save our children, but until we get to that exact moment, we can never be sure, beyond any doubt. I am not seeking to slap around your conviction about your love, but we won’t know. Until the moment of decision, how we will act. I would like to think that I would be able, in that hour, should it come to it, to have the grace to give myself for my children.

This goes beyond that. Paul said that God gave Himself while we were still enemies to the cross. Our sins made us enemies to the cross, and while we were going to be born in our sinful state, Christ loved us, and gave Himself for us.

Like the woman taken in adultery, we were sinners without a cause of redemption. We were not at the point of seeking help. We were taken in our sins. We were, in time, going to be brought to the judgment of God. (Judgment begins at the House of God.) We were going to be defenseless. We were going to be without a sacrifice for sin, until His love for his creation reached across time and space and He robed Himself in flesh and suffered at the hands of His creation. The long suffering love held His hands to the cross. That love reaches across eternity. That love resides is us if we are His child. That love must echo through us.

Love suffers long.

Next week: Love is kind ...